“Oooh,” he said with his forehead knotted in concern, “A Mini-Cooper.”  I had just pulled into Jack’s driveway to show him my new car. It felt strange to be excited about a car. Never cared about them. You could have given me the keys to a lime green station wagon and without a word; I’d have gotten in and driven away.

     That is, until I spotted a Mini-Cooper. My husband found it odd that I:  A) noticed a car B) knew the name of the car. It has been a nightmare of mine that I would one day witness a bank robbery and be the only one to see the getaway car. There I would sit at the police station drinking coffee from a Styrofoam cup while giving my statement. “What kind of car was it?” the officer would ask while I narrowed the description of the getaway car down to something between a golf cart and a bus.

    So, there I was for the first time ever driving around in a new car I was actually excited about and saw Jack standing outside. Slowly, he moved toward his skepticism, “Geez, it’s a little too small for me.” You would think I had pulled up in a unicycle.  “Jack,” I laughed, “All of my life I have wanted to own a go-cart (I really have) and now I feel like I am driving one.” He pulled off his baseball cap and smoothed his hair, “Well, what happens if you get into an accident?" 

     Caution is a good thing when it’s that hair-on-the-back-of-your-neck feeling known as gut instinct. We must discern, however, between gut level instinct and irrational fear. Irrational fear sounds like Darth Vader booming through our headphones telling us that we have control over our destiny. If we believe this to be true, our outward vision becomes covered by caution tape. 

    Allowing fear to take the wheel causes us to pinhole downward into a small, myopic existence where, in the words of T.S.Elliot, "We measure out our lives in coffee spoons.” That's where Jack's been existing for some time now...one careful foot in front of the other. 

     There is only one thing in this entire world, lifetime or history of humankind that we have ever been able to control. Only this: attitude. Nothing more. 

     I'll take the go cart.